Sunday, 27 July 2014

Dawn Of The Planet Of The Apes

Disappointing sequel that sticks too close to formula.


A subtle entwining of a Japanese serial killer movie and an Eastern vengeance thriller that forces each to reflect off the other before a climactic meltdown of stylish brutality scrambles the brain.

Friday, 25 July 2014

The Secret In Their Eyes [El secreto de sus ojos]

An old policeman starts to fret over a case he didn't solve 25 years ago, which also had the inconvenient knock on effect of preventing him from shagging his boss, then makes himself feel better by writing a book about it. And shagging his boss.

Thursday, 24 July 2014


An almost successful Barker adaptation until the last five minutes where somebody in all their wisdom replaces Barker's bleak insanity with some tawdry shock bullshit.

Wednesday, 23 July 2014

Inside [À l'intérieur]

Excellent home invasion nasty that invokes the very French tradition of Grand Guignol to ensure the film stays on the verge of repellent at all times.

Monday, 21 July 2014

The Imposter

Fascinating documentary examining the unlikely intersection between a decidedly rotten part of Texas and a great fat fib.

Dead Snow [Død snø]

What starts as a silly cabin in the woods variant manages to drop all the right film references before surpassing expectation with a sludgy gore fuelled final third.


A gentle precis of life.

Sunday, 20 July 2014

Bangkok Dangerous

Cage plays a hitman who has to do one last job so he teaches a youngster all he knows and falls in love with a deaf chemist. The film then bucks expectation by allowing Cage's character to leave the profession with dignity and live to a ripe old age.
I'm totally bullshitting, he dies. It's his last job for fuck's sake.

Saturday, 19 July 2014

Extraction [Extracted]

Cleverly under played sci-fi about a man trapped inside somebody else's memories who has to discover the 'truth' about 'that night' before he can get out again.

The Castle [Das Schloß]

Haneke tries his hand at comedy by adapting Kafka's unfinished absurdist novel and ends up with something like Terry Gilliam on industrial strength Ritalin.

Wednesday, 16 July 2014

The Lodge

An oblivious young couple arrive at a rented lodge to find a blood splattered, live in janitor who is so blatantly a psychotic killer that he may as well be dragging a corpse about by a fistful of hair. Things then go on from there pretty much as you'd expect.

Sunday, 13 July 2014

Tulpa: Dämonen der Begierde [Tulpa: Demon Of Desire]

The first comercially available version of Tulpa with an English audio track is this German edit which is now considerably shorter and all but omits the two characters who generated the crazier dialogue.
What's left is clearly still barking, Tulpa Guy's scenes are intact and the deaths are gruesomely extreme, the film still stands as a great giallo but unfortunately nowhere near the magnificent lunacy witnessed at Frightfest.

Cutie Honey [Kyûtî Hanî]

An excellent live action rendition of some insane anime that's the equivalent of having icing sugar syringed into your eyeballs.

Transformers: Age Of Extinction [IMAX 3D]

Perfectly awful for the entirety of its too fucking long duration.

Saturday, 12 July 2014

4bia [See prang]

An interlinking quartet of old-skool ghost stories each with an attempted modern flavour;
1. A scary cell phone gag with a laugh out loud ghost manifestation at the end.
2. A girl tears her eyes out in response to the worst CGI you've ever seen.
3. A flat declaration of unoriginality.
4. A bog-standard vengeful spirit. On a plane.

Saturday, 5 July 2014

Insidious: Chapter 2

The regular haunting bag of tricks scattered about an extended corollary of the first film.