Knife Of Ice [Il coltello di ghiaccio/ Silent Horror]

When you’ve watched enough of these it becomes very difficult to find one with an ending that’s genuinely surprising. And then along comes something like Knife Of Ice. Well played Mr. Lenzi.

Sightless

Plays its hand far too early giving you plenty of time to scrutinise just how ludicrous the twist is before it arrives.

The Gentlemen

I had been worried that Trainspotting would be too 90s for the teenager, but then she responded with this 90s throwback that was far more concerned with how it was telling its story rather than what story it was actually trying to tell.

Trainspotting

Another evening of ‘I pick, you pick’ and I’m taking these evenings as an opportunity to take the teenager through some cinema highlights, like this absolutely peerless masterpiece, and broaden her scope. She liked it so much she went and bought the book straight afterward. 

I am doing the good work.

A Quiet Place To Kill [Paranoia]

Umberto Lenzi was clearly so pleased with the success of his first two gialli that he decided to remake them both, only at the same time and as one film.

So Sweet... So Perverse [Così dolce... così perversa]

Shamelessly lifts everything from Les Diaboliques except for the clever twist ending, replaced here with a twist that simply reveals that this film is not Les Diaboliques.

Orgasmo [Paranoia]

Barely a Giallo but certainly a sleazy Italian thriller so bears some comparison and the literal pints of J&B whiskey everybody puts away over the course of events makes up for the lack of stabbings. Made a bit more special by a deliciously nasty sting in the ending that would make Roald Dahl jealous.

Hotel For Dogs

I suggested to the teenager we have an ‘I pick, you pick’ film evening mainly so I could get her to watch The Raid which she enjoyed immensely. But the plan backfired spectacularly when she presented me with this bullet that I thought was long dodged and then regressed into a squealing seven year old for its duration yelling “THAT’S SO CUTE” every time a dog appeared on screen preventing me from being able to save my sanity by having a little kip through it. At least none of the furry fuckers talked, small graces.

The Meg

The teenager told me I’d enjoy this because Jason Statham kicks a gigantic prehistoric shark in the face, something she was absolutely one hundred percent correct about.