Death Walks At Midnight [La morte accarezza a mezzanotte/Cry Out In Terror]

A fashion model agrees to be photographed whilst on industrial strength hallucinogens and then by unfortunate coincidence witnesses a brutal murder. Everybody (photographer, boyfriend, police, fucking everybody) then tries to convince the model that she actually witnessed an identical brutal murder that took place six months earlier, because that's a lot more rational, and when she tries to explain that she did actually witness a different, new brutal murder nobody believes her because she was on drugs.

X-Men: Apocalypse [IMAX 3D]

A bunch of mutants get into a fuss over who's best at controlling clouds of CGI particles. For most of the movie it looks like a smirking green man is the best until, spoiler alert, it turns out he's not.

Batman Begins

The way that five movies worth of plot are efficiently wound round themselves to fit in the space of one movie is astounding, particularly in light of more recent Bat efforts. Bale's raspy voice, however, is not.
The teenager kept asking when Ben Affleck was going to appear, she was disappointed with Bale because, and I quote, 'His head looks like a funny potato'.

Captain America: Civil War [IMAX 3D]

Takes its lead from Winter Soldier by prioritising story from the start, then when the action does kick off it's both eyeball shredding and flecked with character driven humour and at the end nothing large falls out of the sky as the script wisely chooses to drop emotional bombshells instead.
As you leave the cinema you're left to grapple with the twin mystery of how Marvel's finest entry yet is both fronted by their dullest hero and directed by the people behind You, Me and Dupree. A success against all odds.

Green Room

Typical backwoods survival horror elevated to something very special indeed by wry flashes of humour, superb realistic performances and several moments of utter brutality that appear without warning and slap you sharply around the face. I can't remember the last time I heard gasps of shock and disgust belch out at such volume in the rural multiplex.

Death Walks On High Heels [La morte cammina con i tacchi alti]

A lurid thriller with an excellent script that convolutedly twists its way through smut, death and a bunch of different mystery sub-genres all let down by flat direction.

Hardcore Henry [Hardcore]

A found footage action movie. Or Jason Statham's Crank filmed entirely in the first person. Or an overlong gimmick that succeeds at being cool but fails at being a movie. Or like being forced to watch somebody else play tediously loud video games. Or tries really hard, still shit.
Take your pick.

Midnight Special

Quite pleased with myself that I successfully convinced the teenager to go see this, avoiding having to sit through Grumpy Voice vs Wooden Alien a second time. On the up side I got to take her to the cinema to see a film of intelligence that allows you to fill the gaps as the superb imagery and performances unfold before you. On the down side I had the film's carefuly consructed atmosphere of wonder and mystery repeatedly punctured by zingers such as 'I'm confused, who are the good guys and who are the bad guys?' and 'Why does he never smile?' whilst pointing at Michael Shannon.
You win some, you lose some.

Disorder [Maryland]

A clever, refreshing inversion of cinema's usual protrayal of the relationship between a bodyguard and their vulnerable, attractive charge.

Goodnight Mommy [Ich Seh Ich Seh]

Plays all its plot cards very close to its chest in order to create the necessary uneasy ambiguity required for the film to work. Unfortunately the need for ambiguity inadvertently spells out the films final act for you, not that it makes it any less distressing to watch.

Batman v Superman: Dawn Of Justice [IMAX 3D]

A hot mess and as hot messes go they don't get much hotter than this. Or much messier.

10 Cloverfield Lane

Tries its very best to be two films at the same time but ends up being a fulfilling version of neither.

Kung Fu Panda 3 [IMAX 3D]

Episode 3 in Dreamworks' talking animal/Kung Fu hybrid that's big in China. If you like the first two, it's more of the same! Awesome!
If you didn't like the first two, it's more of the same. Stay well away.

Zootropolis [Zootopia]

I couldn't decide whether this was an allegory for sexism, racism, sectarianism or the pervasion of mutants throughout society.
I did know that I was pleased with the overall moral message, which was 'Fuck following your dreams, how about you just try and understand each other, get along and have a good time instead'.
The teenager meanwhile, after such a long period of cold turkey, had a complete talking animal relapse and I may now have to send her off to some sort of rehab to purge before that fucking awful Robinson Crusoe movie comes out.

Anomalisa

The most crushingly accurate depiction of just how awkward most human interaction is, only with no humans. Instead everything's played out by unnervingly realistic stop-motion puppetry TO FUCK WITH YOUR HEAD.