Saturday, 8 August 2015

The Loved Ones

 
Does its very best to not be 'just another torture movie' by deploying heavy emotional back story for every character no matter how minor, a smart counterpoint sub-plot and a Jack Ketchum level of derangement in the final act.
Despite all this it will probably be best remembered for a bit with an electric drill.

Wednesday, 5 August 2015

I Am Chris Farley

 
Determined to be celebratory rather than muck-rake so we get lots of early SNL footage before the last quarter of his life gets seriously glossed over. Did laugh myself to tears at Farley falling through a table though.
 

Monday, 3 August 2015

Spring

 
I was going to be clever and simply say 'Linklater + Lovecraft' but then I realised the poster already says that, so i'll go with 'Accomplished slacker romance with tentacles' instead.
 

Mission: Impossible - Rogue Nation

 
Tiny Tom Cruise manically rushing from one death defying scrape to the next whilst the rest of the film bravely tries to keep up.
 

Monday, 27 July 2015

Inside Out

 

Pixar prove their mastery of the form by anthropomorphising emotional states in order to describe the existential crisis of a pre-teen girl leaving her childhood behind. Primary coloured, funny, touching and deeply profound all at the same time.

 

Saturday, 25 July 2015

The Island

 
Gives away its mysteries a bit too soon, probably because Michael Bay is in a hurry to get to where he can just throw stuff at cars and make Scarlett Johansson pout a lot.
 

Wednesday, 22 July 2015

Society

 
I'm pleased to report that this has weathered it's age extremely well, its still the glorious trash that it was twenty odd years ago. King.

Monday, 20 July 2015

Simon Killer

 
Drab character study of a parasitic wanker.
 

Ant-Man

 
Marvel's most basic formula for hero creation flourishes due to a strong character driven script and a clever inversion of Marvel's sense of scale that ends in superb cosmic weirdness.
 

Sunday, 19 July 2015

The Death Of "Superman Lives": What Happened?

 
An insight into the insanity that is the brain of a movie producer. They really are fucking mental.
 

Saturday, 18 July 2015

Escape Plan

 
Deeply average excuse to put Stallone and Schwarzenegger together despite the fact that they're both far too old for this shit.
 

Tuesday, 14 July 2015

Terminator: Genisys

 
Just makes the contrast between films of yesteryear and the inconsistent, idiotic bullshit of today even more stark.
 

Monday, 13 July 2015

Divergent

 
Another piece of teen fiction that sets up a convoluted restrictive society so it can be brought crashing down through a combination of independent thought, selflessness and running about whooping like a moron.
 

Saturday, 4 July 2015

Giallo

Argento succeeds in emulating the shoddy editing, stilted dialogue and nonsensical plotting of classic Giallo whilst also giving things a modern edge by using digital photography to make it all look flat and stupid.
Meanwhile Adrien Brody gives proceedings an edge of hilarity by radiating a clear, intense disdain for everything going on around him. Here's my favourite as Brody responds to a particularly woeful edit;
 
 
 

Friday, 3 July 2015

We Are The Night [Wir sind die Nacht]

 
A German update of old fashioned lesbian vampires, swamped in flashy, modern consumption.