Monday, 30 April 2012
Saturday, 28 April 2012
Monday, 23 April 2012
Saturday, 21 April 2012
Wednesday, 18 April 2012
Saturday, 14 April 2012
Retrospectively a bit of a shit title for part four of ten.
This one's tough to get through, the characters basically partake in a series of leaden exchanges until they die or run into the rain then die. However, no matter how poor the film gets, its existence is justified by this.
Friday, 13 April 2012
Wednesday, 11 April 2012
Where to start.
There's the teeth grinding anger generated by an oafish American interpretation of London that begins with everybody living in houses across the river from Big Ben and culminates with an English countryside populated with racoons, skunks and vats of molasses.
There's the painfully keen embarrassment generated from Glenn Close's performance, clearly the only person committed to the concept only to end up garrulously over-performing to farm animals before being flung into pigshit.
Then there's the fact that, finally, here is a film that actually would benefit from talking animals, yet they're mute. Presumably to prevent them from out-acting Joely Richardson.
Tuesday, 10 April 2012
Monday, 9 April 2012
Sunday, 8 April 2012
Saturday, 7 April 2012
Thursday, 5 April 2012
Begins a bit like The NeverEnding Story in that a youngster being bullied (here for being red headed) has a chance meeting with a stranger that leads him to adventure. Unfortunately rather than a benign book keeper and a furry dragon, this chap meets Vincent Cassel in full-on, balls out insanity mode and so his adventure ends up involving holding people hostage with a crossbow whilst Cassel has a wank in a jacuzzi.
There's a quote on the back of the box that says "Wonderful looking film", I imagine the original context of the quote to be something along the lines of "Wonderful looking film, what a shame it's total fucking shit".
Likewise "Beautifully shot ... the film defies expectations" is most likely to be "Watching a cool draught goose-pimple the skin of a beautifully shot old man's ballsack would be preferable to this toss, the film defies expectations".
Tuesday, 3 April 2012
Monday, 2 April 2012
Nothing feels quite right, which strikes me as a crying shame.
Charlotte hated it. Her words, not mine.
Since the events of the first movie Herbert West has perfected his glowing serum so it will now reanimate and fuse body parts. He convinces his roommate not to move out by promising to rebuild his dead girlfriend starting with her heart which is then combined with various other discarded body parts. Meanwhile the bad guy from the first film, who was reduced to just a disembodied head, forces a surgeon through hypnosis into grafting bat wings to his temples so he can fly around West's house laughing maniacally.
The kind of thing that would've made Lovecraft shoot himself in the face.